russia. you only live twice – (en)

To more than one, among the conditioned beings, this is going to sound shocking. Maybe, a total delusion. But, since it’s possible there may still be some sober Westerners out there, I wouldn’t be surprised to end up witnessing, soon, in this life, a great tide of refugees leaving Europe to… Russia.

Yes?

Yes!

Russia is the country in which the people is literally being forced –under a “tyrant” like Putin and a government that apparently is like, how to say, a bunch of malignant characters– to earn money, eat tasty non-GM food, go to universities and colleges to study all that hypersonic rocket sciences and repressive mathematics, and ultimately live a genuine alt-capitalist life, even if by Kremlin’s decrees. Russian cities –I can attest to this– are horrible, especially because the amount of nice totalitarian parks they got, where you can have, in a bench [in the summer], an old-fashioned mouthwatering open-faced style red caviar sandwich, which insults the intelligence of Russians abroad, Navalny’s if any … and the international community.

Meanwhile in the West, despite the elite’s mantra: «don’t worry, everything’s fine», one senses that the Titanic’s radar went bloody off last week. I mean, OK, let’s even say that everything is going to go back to normal, that the radar can be fixed. We’re going to concentrate a lot, press hard our temples, and pretend it’s possible. OKAY. Where are we going to go after the improvement? Back to the world that screwed us up in first instance. Doesn’t sound very promising.

So, one way or another, those of us left with half an operational brain are faced with a terrifying dilemma: to adapt to living in an Orwellian reality, including a fairly rapid transition (historically speaking) to third-world monkey economies and servitude standards, or make up our minds and regain personal freedom, common sense, economic stability and opportunities in the country of the “despot” above mentioned. Not to mention a good ol’ iced vodka, which always helps to recover a [long time lost] wide totalitarian laugh.

Actually, the landscape is not the point, nor is vodka (which wouldn’t be bad, by all means), much less an economic question. It is about healing the neurosis produced by a system that no longer fits with the individual [and not the other way around], which only brings nonsense and an abysmal sadness to the soul. The West, today, is like living in an extended family in which everyone is deranged, but they have decided that only one has to go to the hospital to be fixed. And that one is you: they call me crazed, and I call them crazy and, damn, they beat me in votes. And that pseudo-democratic realism insists on treating my mental health as if it were a natural fact, like the weather. But, it turns out that the climate is no longer a natural occurrence but a permanent political-economic effect. As my mental fucking health is –which, it happens, is not that fucked, just a bit preoccupied with soupy fantasies that prevent me from sleeping.

I’m missing some adventure: Trekking through a country that is bigger than Pluto. Being an Elvis born in Vladivostok not knowing what a guitar is. Enjoying the freedom of selling dildos to the Germans on the internet [sounds pretty uplifting to me]. Less woke, more deep sleep. Less phony ideology, more real sex. Anything, in Russia, somewhere in Russia, to be human again … if only they give me a chance [and a Visa].

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Russia. You only live twice – Dugutigui