in the corps – (en)

IN THE CORPS_Dugutigui
—What’s your excuse?
—Sir, excuse for what, sir?
—I’m asking the fucking questions here, Private! Do you understand?
—Sir, yes, sir!
—Do you suck dicks?
—Sir, NO, sir!
—Sir, NO, sir!
—Sir, NEGATIVE, sir!
—What is your major malfunction, maggots? Why the hell you three were late after the leave? You! Huge Orgasm, what’s your excuse?
—Sir, Hugh Jordan, my mother was sick, and went to town to make a conference call, and … !
—And what about you scroungy little Jack Off fuck, huh?
—Sir, Jack van ‘t Hoff, reporting as ordered, I went to the airport because my brother is going to work in Canada and as surely it’ll be many years without seeing each other, I draw upon as he was in transfer and …
—Then you did that on purpose! You wanna be different! You will not laugh! You will not cry! You will learn by the numbers. The way I see it ladies, you just signed your own death warrant! As soon as your bunks are done, I want you two faggots to start cleaning the head until I’ll be proud to go in and take a dump. Then the mess hall! Then … then … I’ll think about! You are FUBAR, worthless piece of shit! Get outta my face!
—Sir, aye aye, sir!
—Sir, aye aye, sir!
IN THE CORPS_0_Dugutigui
—And you little piece of communist shit? What about you Joker? Is it your mommy or is it you little clone?
—Sir, Joe Kerr, sir. No sir, a thing happens to me … you see … I was phlegmatically coming to the camp when suddenly, passing through a grove, I hear a voice behind me japing “Chisstt, Chisstt…” I turn and see a gorgeous Mercedes parked right under the trees, and a voice that comes from within and japes again, “Chisstt, Chisstt…” I stop, observe, check up the AO, and approach cautiously, and when I reach the car a door opens, “Clas!” just like that! … It could be a situation, because it was a solitary place, but I got closer. Then, a bimbo looms up … Oooohhh my gawd! … you follow me? … blonde, elegant, with a mini fuchsia dress … beyond belief, sir … and she goes, “get into the wheels John Wayne, I’m driving you to the glory!” … and I say, “sorry ma’am but I have to return to the barracks. The schedule is sacred.” Then she tells me, “I thought jarheads have dicks.” So I get even closer and looking at her with contempt I answer, “soldiers have dicks, and we the Marines have so much that we lend out for transplants.” She goes, “Ha! Is that so?” So I answer, “You’re going to see it” and, “Chan!” I jump inside the whip. Holly cow shit! She was horny as hell! She rips her dress and the billibongs jump out! … What uh God’s milk bottles, sir! … And she says to me “Let’s see, what you know to do with this?” But, no! I look at her fixedly and say, “they are not bad, but me, for a pair of tits, I’m not late in the camp.” Then she feels jilted and, “Zas!” … lunge on my fly and, “Chan” … she makes me a fellatio … I, at first, was as paralyzed, you know? But I realized that if I do not react quickly, I’d lose control of the situation, so I grab her hair and pull her mouth off my virile limb, and I say, “enough of bad habits, you are going to find out for what is this worth.” So I’m going on, put her spread-eagle on the seat of the car and savagely ripped her panties and, “Chumba!” I put my thing inside her with a blow. Holly shit how jumped and twisted the sick bitch, asking for more and more, and me “Chumba, “Chumba, Chumba!” Five in a row!!
—Or six! Sore and crippled she was.
—Later on, already relaxed and having a butt, she told me she was married with a rich guy, but he didn’t make her happy in bed, and, occasionally, she went out to look for a stud to give her sexual satisfaction.
—True, these vicious babes go mad for uniforms!
—Precisely this is what happens to this one!
—A similar thing happened to me when I was stationed near the Canadian border. It was already dusk and I was going down the road to the camp, which was, well, as separate from the population … when suddenly a convertible stops beside with two French pussies in and …
—Sorry sir, but it sounds “Taps…”
—A fucking orgy man! … I’ll tell you later in the canteen… hehehehe!
—Yes, sir…
—Fucking Joe, what a piece of adventure you had man!
—Lucky Joe!! And on the top you skipped the black hole!
—What a fucking luck? I was watching a porn film and fell asleep. The only luck is the jackass of the Sergeant doesn’t know the plot of the movie!
In the Corps – Dugutigui

About Dugutigui

In the “Diula” language in Mali, the term « dugutigui » (chief of the village), literally translated, means: «owner of the village»; «dugu» means village and «tigui», owner. Probably the term is the result of the contraction of «dugu kuntigui» (literally: chief of the village).
This entry was posted in English, Humor and tagged , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to in the corps – (en)

  1. it was all so believable…until the droptop in Canada…;) Dam, Duggie, your voice is loud and proud and in charge! So unique and fresh–writing this trite observation just emphasizes that.

    • Dugutigui says:

      Adjusting reality to the script, it was “near” the border with Canada, in this side🙂 and they were two brand new Minnie-Mouse-Croissants who probably fell out of the ugly tree at birth and hit every branch on the way down … Hahahahaha!!
      Thanks a lot for your constant nice words!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s