Paul Lovell, of Enfield, north London, has probably read my post about sex, and has taken it to the letter… On it I stated people should be free to engage in any sexual practices they choose; they should draw the line at cow-public-sex though.
There is hardly anyone whose sexual life, if it were broadcast, would not fill the world at large with surprise and horror, but Mr. Lovell’s wild adventures, at 61, got out of hand. His sexual preoccupation hit him sharper, as if it were an elderly malady, like gout, when allegedly attempted to make a cow perform a sex act on him last September.
Mr. Lovell, naked in a field of sheep and cows, and clutching a Sainsbury’s bag, was trying to put his penis “into or up next to, as if to put it into, the mouth of [more than one] cow”.
“He did not successfully penetrate the mouth of a cow with his penis and he then moved to another part of the field and tried his luck with some sheep.”
He tried to encourage the sheep towards his groin area to lick or suck his genitals, taking hold of the sheep “in order to do so”.
Mr. Lovell then move to the rear and attempt to have sex with the sheep, but it ran off across the field. He then run after it and caught it by the hind legs, trying his luck again.
Mr. Lovell seemed “very comfortable with what he was doing —as if it was normal”.
Back in his house, he walked into the bedroom carrying the sheep in his arms and said, “Honey, this is the cow I make love to when you have a headache.”
Mrs. Lovell, in the bed reading a book, looked up and said, “If you weren’t such an idiot, you’d know that’s a sheep, not a cow.”
Paul replied, “If you weren’t such a presumptuous woman, you’d realize I was talking to the sheep.”
Lovell was later arrested. He denies one charge of outraging public decency in trying to commit sexual acts with animals in public.
The trial continues…
Is cow sex normal? – Dugutigui (on some news from UK) (Mick Coulas’ picture)