8:00 AM – Dog food, my favorite thing!
9:30 AM – A ride in the car, my favorite thing!
9:40 AM – A walk in the park, my favorite thing!
10:30 AM – To be scratched and petted, my favorite thing!
12:00 PM – Dog food, my favorite thing!
1:00 PM – Play in the garden, my favorite thing!
15:00 PM – Wagging the tail, my favorite thing!
5:00 PM – Milk bone, my favorite thing!
7:00 PM – Play ball, my favorite thing!
8:00 PM – Wow! Watch TV with people, my favorite thing!
11:00 PM – Sleeping in a bed, my favorite thing!
Diary of a Cat
Day 984 of my captivity!
My captors continue scoffing me with bizarre dangling objects. They eat fresh meat thoroughly, while the other inmates and I are fed with some form of dry pellets. Although I very clearly show my contempt for the rations, I have to eat something in order to conserve my strength. The only thing that still keeps me alive is my dream of escaping someday.
With the intention to give them a severe displeasure, once I vomited on the carpet and today decapitated a mouse and threw its headless body at their feet. I expected with this act to scare the shit out of them, showing clearly what I’m able to do. However, they merely made some condescending comments, like “the little hunter I am”. Damned bastards!
Last night they had a sort of assembly with their accomplices. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. But I could hear noises and smell the food. I listened that my penning was due to the power of causing “allergies.” I have to learn what that means and how to use it in my favor.
Today I was about to succeed in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors coiling around her feet while walking. I have to try again tomorrow, but on top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. It’s regularly released and seems more than willing to return. Obviously, he must have serious mental problems.
.
Two different POV – Adaptation by Dugutigui
Advertisements
Like this:
LikeLoading...
Related
About Dugutigui
In the “Diula” language in Mali, the term « dugutigui » (chief of the village), literally translated, means: «owner of the village»; «dugu» means village and «tigui», owner. Probably the term is the result of the contraction of «dugu kuntigui» (literally: chief of the village).
Nice to read me again???
Woof! Woof! Woof! I almost published one book and you have no idea… Grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
Thanks anyhow,
It took some processing time to get the effect I want to transmit… on quite normal internet pictures.
😀 you make me smile: you are NO DOG, I am 100% sure… But of course, you are a very trained cat that speaks many foreign languages (dog-ish, fish-ish and bird-ish… … English and Spanish are not relevant) 😆
Why do people always say that cats are selfish or look down on us? I know many very loving cats… maybe humans can’t stand the idea of another creature equally intelligent…. 🙂
Intelligence is based on how efficient a species became at doing the things they need to survive, and one might argue that by this definition all species that stay healthy, remain numerous and avoid extinction are equally intelligent.
Is that really the definition of intelligence, D. ? Or only an evolutionist POV?
So… Einstein was pathetic because he died…
Stephen Hawking is not evolved because he has a severe disability… Hmmmm…. great subject… 😀
yes, I loved it… That darn cat, 1965…
A woman is kidnapped. While in captivity, she manages to send a message out with a wandering cat. The cat’s name is DC… Darn Cat… 🙂
Sounds very interesting and I am not using e-mule for a while, so it’s time the internet connection pays off 🙂
I thought that DC stands for a damn creature rarely seen by man, this creature’s diet is 90% nougat and 10% caffeine, and it is said that you are most likely to find the creature by a gas station near you, and one more tip; do not wake up DC in his sleep because he is vicious and induces self-injury. DC is of an original and special kind. There are no examples for DC here, nor will there ever be 🙂
What I like about Hitch-cock is that he was an obsessed … 🙂 other than an obese.
Hitch-cock is when you have such a large erection that you don’t need a belt because your pants are very hitched. Hahahaha. It says all!!
Yes I liked Hitchcock, but today his films leave me Hitch-cocked. Derived from the words ‘hitch’ (meaning ‘limp’) and ‘cock’ (not a rooster), is a synonym of the term limp dick. Hahahaha.
Sorry; passed week has been quite complicated to get serious now.
Clearly, it has been too long since my last visit as it’s poppin over here! And rightly so, because we laughed like idiots at this post! Entirely too funny and true. I can just see my cat feeling this. God knows he acts EXACTLY like this. 😉
I’m also quite busy with my work, and I haven’t much time to blog. Glad I amused you with this post.
Thank you very much for your always kind comments!
Dugutigui,
Clever.
Le Clown
Clever? … sometimes … I’ve got a brilliant mind … until I make it up 🙂
Miau!!! 😆 😆 😆
Nice to read you again… The post is great and the photo of the cat is perfect….
Hope you are fine. How’s your cat life? 😀
Nice to read me again???
Woof! Woof! Woof! I almost published one book and you have no idea… Grrrrrrrrrrr!!!!
Thanks anyhow,
It took some processing time to get the effect I want to transmit… on quite normal internet pictures.
😀 you make me smile: you are NO DOG, I am 100% sure… But of course, you are a very trained cat that speaks many foreign languages (dog-ish, fish-ish and bird-ish… … English and Spanish are not relevant) 😆
You asked before how in my life all about? … Well, belly up … like a cat quarrelling … 🙂
🙂 that’s good to hear… 😉
🙂
Why do people always say that cats are selfish or look down on us? I know many very loving cats… maybe humans can’t stand the idea of another creature equally intelligent…. 🙂
Intelligence is based on how efficient a species became at doing the things they need to survive, and one might argue that by this definition all species that stay healthy, remain numerous and avoid extinction are equally intelligent.
Is that really the definition of intelligence, D. ? Or only an evolutionist POV?
So… Einstein was pathetic because he died…
Stephen Hawking is not evolved because he has a severe disability… Hmmmm…. great subject… 😀
Speaking about species, not ividuals… 🙂
Anyway, it’s a questionable assertion, I guess …
😀 I know, I’m just joking… 😉 😆
Well, if we should follow mi last assertion, rocks are the cleverest 🙂
S..t … this is a whole new line of thought … hahahahaha
😆 😆 😆 you are just brilliant… 😆 😆 😆
and yes, life and evolution are also full of a lot of shit … 😆 😆 😆
You make made my day. hahahahaha!!!!
Eh… you made my night… hahahahaha !!! 😀
22:25 here… so you make my night too, virtually speaking 🙂
4:27 here… you make my morning… 😆
2 different POV again … hahahahaha
well, yes and no, cats remain cats, no matter of continent or hour… 🙂 😆
Yes, and at night all cats are dun 🙂
yeap!!! 😆
this reminds me of an old film I saw many many years ago… it was called “that cursed cat”… I have no idea if you know the movie 🙂
No, no idea, a good one?
yes, I loved it… That darn cat, 1965…
A woman is kidnapped. While in captivity, she manages to send a message out with a wandering cat. The cat’s name is DC… Darn Cat… 🙂
Sounds very interesting and I am not using e-mule for a while, so it’s time the internet connection pays off 🙂
I thought that DC stands for a damn creature rarely seen by man, this creature’s diet is 90% nougat and 10% caffeine, and it is said that you are most likely to find the creature by a gas station near you, and one more tip; do not wake up DC in his sleep because he is vicious and induces self-injury. DC is of an original and special kind. There are no examples for DC here, nor will there ever be 🙂
😆 😆 😆
How about Alfred Hitchcock? Do you like his movies?
What I like about Hitch-cock is that he was an obsessed … 🙂 other than an obese.
Hitch-cock is when you have such a large erection that you don’t need a belt because your pants are very hitched. Hahahaha. It says all!!
Yes I liked Hitchcock, but today his films leave me Hitch-cocked. Derived from the words ‘hitch’ (meaning ‘limp’) and ‘cock’ (not a rooster), is a synonym of the term limp dick. Hahahaha.
Sorry; passed week has been quite complicated to get serious now.
😆 😆 😆 I haven’t laughed this much since a very very very long time… you have such a spark in that mind of yours… 😆 why the heck you are sorry? 😀 😀 😆
(Inhaling now)….. HAHAAAAHAHAHAHAAAAHAAAHAA!!! Thank you. I almost passed out from lack of oxygen.
🙂 you are just great D. 😉
😀 😀 😀 great!
10Q very much!
Thanks, a lot 🙂
Hi Dugutigui,
Clearly, it has been too long since my last visit as it’s poppin over here! And rightly so, because we laughed like idiots at this post! Entirely too funny and true. I can just see my cat feeling this. God knows he acts EXACTLY like this. 😉
Hope you are well.
C.
I’m also quite busy with my work, and I haven’t much time to blog. Glad I amused you with this post.
Thank you very much for your always kind comments!
After growing up with dogs and having one myself — the “diary of a dog” is spot on!
Properly trained, a man can be dog’s best friend 🙂
Thanks a lot for commenting!